Rain Smith, an autistic enby, managed to land an interview with a prestigious technology company that shall not be named in this story. Smith explains, “I was nervous. It is rather hard for us to pass interviews and land a job. Last interview I did, they told me I was both underqualified and overqualified for the same job.”

Unfortunately for Smith, they did not pass the interview. We reached out to the interviewers for an explanation. Nancy Watson, head of HR, looking away in the distance, said, “Smith was not using eye contact enough. It is a dead giveaway because liars avoid eye contact.”

On the other hand, Robert Billings, head of engineering, with a unblinking gaze exposing our very soul, explained, “Smith used too much eye contact in their interactions with us. It is well known that people who excessively look at you have something to hide.”

Watson continued, “There’s a sweet spot of eye contact we look for. We want candidates to show just the right amount of eye contact.” Asked for further comments, Watson said, “Oh! And Smith also asked for accommodations. We all know what this means: this person is just faking for attention. Am I right?”

Smith is still on the lookout for a job. They are currently learning how to produce just the right amount of eye contact to pass an interview.

The reign of Empress… er… Mimimouch of the Gnorflax Empire ended yesterday in the most unexpected way. She was defeated by an autistic man.

Her messenger reported, “The Empress would use the splendor of her glare to force us to bow down before her. Her glare was irresistible.”

She asked her messenger who would it be that would be immune to her glare. “I answered that would be immune to her glare the one who does not even perceive the glares.” This answer turned out to be prophetic.

Apparently, the Empress did not count on the fact that some autistic people are terrible at reading body language, and thus would not read her glares. Enter the autistic man we mentioned earlier, Mr. Shitbucketemptier.

“I came over to empty her shit bucket. She tried glaring at me, but I suck at reading body language and did not read her glare.” Thus, the Empress was powerless over Mr. Shitbucketemptier.

He became the Hero of the Realm when he drowned her accidentally in her bath.