I tried Apple’s Hearing Test, and I couldn’t believe the results I got. Who would have thought that I was experiencing the type of hearing loss average for people my age? Definitely not me.

The first thing the test did was to prove to me that I could indeed hear. Wow! I would have never known this without taking Apple’s test. I guess the incessant yammering of friends should have clued me in, but I couldn’t know for sure until I took the test. Amazing!

Then the test demonstrated by A + B that I’m suffering from hearing loss. I would have never guessed it. My wife and kids would probably have guessed it, however, seeing as they keep saying that I put the TV volume too high. At any rate, now I have an excuse for mishearing song lyrics all the time.

I plan to use my earbuds to hide my hearing loss. To the rest of the world, I’ll just look like someone who likes to bob his head and tap his foot to the music. This is going to come in extremely handy during work meetings, or when I’m having a discussion with my loved ones.

The article that inspired this satire:

https://www.techradar.com/audio/i-tried-apples-hearing-test-and-the-results-shocked-me