The CEO of Boeing, Kelly Ortberg, started giving his speech at Boeing’s Seattle Delivery Center in the usual manner. Soon, however, things took a turn for the strange. A member of the audience explains, “He was telling us how the product we sell is a reflection of ourselves. I did not realize how prophetic his words would turn out to be.”

As Ortberg was talking, he punctuated his speech with gesticulations. That’s when his arms detached themselves from his body. Another member of the audience says, “I was looking at him, and all of a sudden, one of his arms just flew off into the crowd in front of him. A few seconds later, the second arm flew off into the crowd on the other side of the podium.”

Startled, the audience members ran for the exits. Ortberg tried to calm them down, saying that this was a mere inconvenience and that Boeing would come out strong. However, his head eventually detached from his neck, springing forward towards the audience. “It was like those skibibi (sic) toilet videos that the kids watch. Awful!” an audience member told us.

This proved to be the final blow. His body then experienced total decompression and fell onto the stage. Boeing issued this statement, “Today, Kelly Ortberg, CEO of Boeing, experienced an unscheduled disassembly in mid-speech. Our hearts and mind go to the people traumatized by this event.”

Boeing has been hounded by quality assurance problems as their planes have suffered unscheduled disassembly in midair, and have been grounded by the FAA.